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Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Yesterday, I posted a tip for dealing with Power Struggles and this morning, I found another resource for advice that I think is fantastic!
The thing that I love about the parenting article by Karan Sims is: she talks about empowering instead of overpowering the child. That is a much better position for raising healthy adults as we are teaching them early on to be confident in making choices and modeling how to be centered regardless of what others may think. In addition to that, there cannot be a power struggle unless two people are involved in a push-me pull-me. In other words, it takes two to tango! Thanks Karan for your great article and the tips you suggest! Out of the variety offered, I am sure one or more can work beautifully to enhance the relationship between the adult and the child! Any readers have success stories that you can share on this topic? I would love to hear it and I am sure others would get great value from your examples! Labels: babies, children, family, kids, parenting, toddlers by: Pat Graham-Block 5 CommentsLinks to this post
Friday, April 18, 2008
The very best way to avoid a power struggle with a child is to use "visioning". What is visioning? Visioning is the same process that is used prior to going into any activity whereby you want to excel! In other words, let's say you are going to be presenting an idea at a business meeting and you want the idea to be accepted well by the other participants of the meeting. (Before you think I have gone off my rocker because all of a sudden, I am speaking about business meetings and not kids... bear with me - I'm going somewhere with this!) If you were wanting to make sure your ideas in a business meeting were accepted well by the other folks in the meeting, any knowledgeable business coach would advise you to envision, in advance, what it is you want to have happen in the presentation. You might say to yourself a few times in advance of the meeting, "During this meeting, I want to be clear in my ideas, clear in my presentation of my ideas, have the idea accepted well and regardless of what happens, I want to feel great!" [By the way, this concept in taught in a much bigger way in many business books  I would recommend.]Now, back to you and "presenting" ideas to kids, as that is what this blog is about! ;-) Let's say you are getting ready to put your child to bed. And you have noticed in the last few weeks that he/she has been a bit cranky and now, there is a pattern of struggle that has set itself up every evening over this issue. Imagine, in advance, and you might even say this to yourself over and over, in anticipation: "Tonite, when it is time to put (name) to bed, I am going to feel centered, I am going to be clear in my suggestion that now is the time to get some sleep for another fun day tomorrow, I am going to have this segment of the evening go smoothly and regardless of what happens, I am going to feel great!" And then, fully expect that it will go well and as you have "rehearsed" in your mind! Now, in the event it does not, it only means there needs to be a bit more practice on your part in having this new pattern be your reality. In other words, your expectation, and thus, your success with having this segment of the evening go well will be the norm, with practice. Try this and let me know how you make out with it! :-) Labels: advice, children, parenting, tips, toddlers by: Pat Graham-Block 16 CommentsLinks to this post |
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